Temper! Temper!

Anger is a primary emotion that all humans have. How one deals with anger depends on the person’s personality, coping skills, and mental health.

Anger can be a good and bad thing. A small amount of anger can lead a person to change or find solutions to the problem that is making one mad. On the other hand, large amounts of anger for long periods of time are not good. Anger can be the gateway to fighting, verbal abuse, health related risks, and poor relationships.

What can one do when they are about to lose their temper?

• Stop what one is doing, take a deep breath, and count to 10. Think calming thoughts.
• If angry at someone in particular, put yourself in their shoes. What is causing that person to behave or act accordingly?
• Instead of yelling in anger, calmly have a conversation with the person about whatever situation is angering you.
• If a conversation just isn’t in the cards, walk away and calm down. Exercising helps to relieve stress and anger by clearing the mind.
• Practice stress management. Get enough sleep, eat properly, and relax.

These 5 techniques may not be enough for some. Anger can be all consuming. Psychologists and therapists help people overcome anger issues that have been embedded for years into one’s daily life. In therapy, people are taught strategies on how to control anger. There are three basic strategies that are used:

• Relaxation – I touched upon this in the quick strategy section above although therapists take this to a whole new level. Think about something that makes you mad. For argument’s sake, let’s use the neighbor’s dog that just doesn’t stop barking in the middle of the night. Once you are thinking about that situation and you are angry, a therapist will tell you to think about a calming image or word, maybe an image of a cute kitty. This sequence gets practiced over and over!
• Cognitive therapy – The power of positive thoughts! This pertains to thinking positive thoughts versus negative thoughts in a situation that makes one angry. Instead of wallowing in the negative, which makes one madder, taking the glass is half full approach negates the anger.
• Skill Development – We learn something new everyday. No one knows it all! Some people need help with developing the skills to overcome anger and therapists have coping mechanisms for overcoming anger issues.

If you are having trouble with anger, please contact our office to schedule an appointment.

Written by: Mindy Perry, Marketer
 

Citations:

American Psychological Association. (2011). How a psychologist can help you manage anger. Retrieved from http://www.apa.org/topics/anger/help.aspx

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